Ubuntu

Ubuntu (Zulu pronunciation: [ùɓúntʼù])[1] is a Nguni term meaning “humanity.” It is often translated as “I am because we are,” or “humanity towards others,” or in Xhosa, “umntu ngumntu ngabantu” but is often used in a more philosophical sense to mean “the belief in a universal bond of sharing that connects all humanity.”

I searched for the most direct means of defining who Diana Boernstein was, or at least how I perceived her. The single word I am able to come up with is ‘Ubuntu’

I met Diana in 1986. She offered me accommodation at her Greenwich village loft when I was a student at Hunter College. I had just arrived in New York City four months prior to that on a scholarship from South Africa. I stayed at her loft until 1990/91. I’m not sure about the exact dates. Considering how expensive rents are in New York City, I was virtually living at her loft rent free. She charged me an unbelievably low price.

Putting that aside; the most Ubuntu thing Diana did for me was when she rescued me from deep trouble I got into in 1994. I had a brush in with the law. An arrest and a criminal charge. Although it was for a misdemeanor, it was really serious stuff that felt like I had no ground to stand on. I had never been in such a predicament before that. It made me feel completely vulnerable. As things unfolded, I felt alone with no one to reach out to for help.

However; when I told Di about the trouble I was in, she did all she could to help me. She hired me the best lawyer. On top of that she paid for all the cost for the entire duration of the case. My case was remanded many times over a period of almost a year before it was finally dismissed. Meanwhile, throughout the duration of my court appearances, Di braved taking the subway to and from the Brooklyn Supreme Court house. She did that to come give me moral support. Other than her, I had no one else to do that for me.

I don’t know if any of you have an idea about the nature of the New York City subway environment. It is a threatening place and can feel hostile to someone that’s not used to it. There’s the loud clacking noise of metal as the trains zoom in and out of the train station. The graffiti that’s scrawled all over the surfaces, and the energetic bustling youths who wear baggy clothes and hoodies. Not to mention the smell and mugginess of the atmosphere, the litter and the rats, etc. I will never forget the discomfort Di used to express through her body language about riding the NYC subway trains when she came to give me moral support. On one of the days she came to court to stand by me, she told me that she didn’t like to ride the subway because of the dangers that are inherent in using that mode of transport. She said she put that aside because her concern was to see me acquitted. And certainly, after many appearances and postponements, my case was finally dismissed.

I know that she did what she did for me out of the kindness of her heart. She showed me compassion and never asked for anything in return. In South Africa we call that Ubuntu. That quality is rare amongst many people in the world we live in today. A lot of people nowadays think of themselves, and what’s best for them alone. Di was the antithesis of that. She was generous to many people.

I have many memories about her. The stories I can tell about Diana are endless. She made a huge difference to my life. It has been a blessing to know her.

Thank you Diana for showing me Ubuntu. May your soul rest in eternal peace.

💔

Rudzani